1. says

    Larry, what you’ve come up here is awfully similar to what Alan Deutschman writes about in his book Change or Die, down to using “three Rs” for making change effective. His three are “Relate” (find someone who’s doing what you want to do, and connect with them), “Repeat” (similar to your “Repeat” — it’s a pretty obvious one to have in this context!), and finally “Reframe” (learn to think about what you’re doing differently, but only after the work of repeating is fully done). I’d recommend the book to you — you seem to have come to a lot of the same conclusions, and his perspective may well help you talk about it with others. He also talks about the three Fs of ineffective change: Fear, Facts, and Force, which people frequently use to drive change and which almost always fail.

    • says

      Thanks, Tom. Yes, I have read Change or Die a couple of times (in fact, it was someone at noodles who told me about it a year or so ago – possibly you?). I refer to it often, citing one or more of his 3 F’s or 3 R’s almost every day :)

      Deutschman’s and other trios of R‘s run amok in the behavior change and habit formation world. Duhigg’s model of how habits work, for example, can be stated as Reminder (he uses “cue”), Routine, and Reward. And there are several blog posts and articles that use these or other sets of R’s. I’m more concerned here with the process of habit formation than with describing how the ensuing habit works, so, even though I was a little concerned about getting caught up in the crush of R’s, I couldn’t find a better three buckets in which to drop the concepts I cover.

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